Life is full of disappointments. Some, we readily shrug off and forget. Others seem to linger, or even to take deep and firm root within our hearts. In one regard, this is only natural- we look back on our lives and smile at the moments and choices that resulted in satisfactions, but we also regret those certain decisions we’ve made or perhaps had failed to make. With this latter especially, we may set our minds to wondering about “what might have been”, “if only…..” and other such ponderings that leave us mired in our disappointment(s) and longing for an imaginary present (stemming from an imaginary past)- This is particularly true when things aren’t going quite to our plans or in line with our efforts, or when we’ve hit a notably rough patch of road on the going.
The real problem isn’t being disappointed. Rather, it is in our lingering or dwelling upon our disappointments where the problem lies. When we dwell on the fantasies of “what might have been, if only……” or we concentrate so much of our time and emotional energy on the situation / person / thing of disappointment, we not only lose the moment which God has given us (and one, I may add, we will never have again once it passes from the present), but we lose our sense of peace. We lose any manifestation of the inner stillness with which we are blessed when we are otherwise concentrated on regrets. We miss out on the real beauty of the lives which God has given us, and we lose touch with the mere joy of living. Granted, it doesn’t mean that we are always going to be leaping and dancing, laughing, and full of smiles as in some dreamy, utopian sort of “heaven on earth”. Instead, the joy we have within is a gift of God, the indwelling of the Holy Spirit that allows us the strength of spirit to accept the challenges, difficulties, and even pain that will come our way in this fallen world. It allows us to experience these things, and have the conviction to move through them in faith, fully trusting in God’s mercy.
The enemy of our souls would love nothing more than for us to lose our focus on God, to disconnect from the knowledge and trust of his mercy, to lose sight of the greater goal for that which occupies the immediate. Every bump in the road is a chance to become misled into that dim forest of despondency, wandering among the underbrush of our disappointments, which tear at our clothes and flesh like the sharp thorns of tangled briars. Life is all too short and it is easy to waste what little moments we are afforded in clinging to regrets. We must remain watchful and focused, giving but a fleeting notice to a moment of disappointment or regret- these moments will come and will naturally catch our attention. However, we must not tarry there, but instead engage our will by the grace and mercy of God to let such moments go. Otherwise, we blindly fall into the enemy’s trap, and are led astray in the bleakness of our bitter thoughts. We are then made more vulnerable to his urgings, to be more easily turned from the love and grace of God. In this, we are robbed of our joy, and kept from the wholeness of heart and mind that keeps us on the path to salvation.